Ol' Squinty McGuinty's got hisself all wired up like a Chrissmas tree 'bout this here Newfie oil deal. Ol' Dalton an' his gang is a-sayin' that them there Newfies is gettin' the long end o' the stick an' them there Ontariariarians is a-takin' it up the pooper.
Now the big feller in Ottawa is Fartin' Martin an' he ain't a-takin' any o' ol' Dalton's guff. Pryminister Martin is a-comin' back at ol' Ginty and sez that Ontariariario is a-gettin' 40 percents worth more than they was a-gettin'. Now it's a-lookin' like Lord Calvert's reserve over in Saskskakewan an' them fellers up there in Sargeant Prestonland are a-fixin' t' get their just rewards, too.
Now, ol' Inky Wells over t' the Macleans is a-spoutin' on this here Newfie deal an PollyWolly sez that ol' DannyBoy was all full o' horsepuckey when he was a-carryin' on an' pullin' down the Canajun maple leaf from offa them there Newfie flagpoles. Ol' PollyWolly Inkwells sez that the new Newfie deal ain't a lick different than the old Newfie deal afore them flags started a-comin' down.
Now in this here photygraf that I stole offa the CBC, it's lookin' like ol' Dalton's a-cryin' in his beer pitcher an' he's practicin' his hitch-hikin' moves. He's mebbe worried that if them there Newfies an' sodbusters an' igloo builders get all o' Ontariariario's dough, he's gonna lose his limousine an' hafta hitch a ride t' the Queen's Park.
I'm jest waitin' fer them have-not providences to take enuff o' ol' Dalton's dough that they can buy Trawna an' drag it over t' Newfie or out t' Saskskakewan or mebbe up to them Northwestern Terrytories.