Tuesday, May 17, 2005

The Wreck o' the Good Ship Belinda

Whooee! I wrote me a little song 'bout ol' B-Linda an' I made a audio boog mp3 recordin' o' me singin' it fer all o' my thousands an' thousands o' readers.

The Wreck o' the Good Ship Belinda

The legend lives on from Ottawa on down
Of the parliament gal called Belinda.
The Conservative scamp joined the Liberal camp;
Yessir, that's the big tent she went inta.

With a load o' Dad's money, she's a cute, little honey
And ol' Prime Minister Martin's sure happy.
The rich, glamour-gal's got some 905 pals,
And MagnaMoney from Frankie, her Pappy.

Belinda was the pride of the Red Tory side,
On gay marriage and such, she's progressive.
An' now Harper's bunch say she's right out t' lunch
The mud-slingin' is gettin' obsessive.

Justice Gomery's inquiry's makin' tattletale sounds
'Bout a wave of Liberal wrong-doin'.
The Grits' AdScam dirt was startin' t' hurt;
In the polls, they was takin' a screwin'.

The PM came late and the press corps hadta wait
For a ten fifty-five mornin' briefin'.
Belinda's bomsbshell blew 'em all clear t' hell,
Said the Big-C's she'd lost all belief in.

The pundits chimed in with inevitable spin,
On her goin' where offers was sweeter,
Her lustin' for power made her gal o' the hour;
She's got some 'splainin' t' do to ol' Peter.

In a musty old hall in Newmarket they prayed
In Conservative riding headquarters.
The money all spent, they asked who'll pay the rent?
Has Frank got anymore daughters?

Does anyone know where Belinda will go,
When she finds out the Liberals are rotten?
Belinda might stay or she might fade away;
It ain't likely she'll be soon forgotten.

Click here t' lissen t' ol' JimBobby singin' off key.

14 comments:

Kruppe said...

Bwahahah! VERY funny. A bombshell, no doubt! (the defection, not the woman)

treehugger said...

Priceless JB, absolutely a thigh slapping price rendition of ole Gordie's tune.

jc said...

Yup, that's just plain scary...Maybe Harper should play it and say..."So you think I'm scary."

Balbulican said...

Too bad you said all those mean things about Adrienne Clarkson, JB...otherwise this woulda got you both a Juno AND an Order of Canada.

Aaron said...

Buddy, I tellsya, datsome good, good sheit dere. Nice.

sean incognito said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
sean incognito said...

Brilliant!

Deep inside every redneck beats the heart of a poet.

Now how about lyrics for Belinda's kiss-off to Peter MacKay, to the tune of "That's What You Get For Lovin' Me"

JimBobby said...

Whooee! Thankee fer all them nice things you fellers sed. I reckon it was tuff sayin' nice things after lissenin' t' my scratchy squallin'.

I was jest sayin' t' Ma this mornin' - I wonder if ol' PeteFeller might jest waltz with his sweetheart across the aisle. He might chase the bright, elusive social butterfly of love.

I feel sorry fer pore ol' Petey more'n fer Harpoon. I reckon Harpoon's got trouble holdin' on t' his leader's seat when his team's lost a star player an' he let her get away. PeteFeller's gotta deal with all of us boogers makin' fun of'm an' he's also gotta deal with his bossman Stevie who ain't gonna be in a good mood. On top o' that, he's gotta try and convince Canajuns that the progressives got some kinda say-so in the Big-C tent.

I like that suggestion o' "That's What You Get for Lovin' Me". I ain't sure whether I'll tease pore little Petey with it but it's got good potential fer polyticks. "That's what you get fer choosin' me... "

An' then there's "Black Day in July". We'll hafta see if ol' Harpoon's dumb enuff t' get us votin' right away quick. I figger it's his loss if he does.

JB

Timmy the G said...

I think I suffered a laugh-related injury. Absolutely hilarious, JB.

stageleft said...

Do you have any idea how hard it's gonna be to sleep tonight, or work tomorrow for that matter, with you singing that song in my head :-)

Gazetteer said...

I disagree with sean incognito--

But it's only a matter of transposition.

Princess Monkey said...

Jim Bobby: You are indeed a riot. I've seen some coverage of the Queen's visit and I immediately thought of you. You must be SO excited ;)

Blooger said...

good one JB .we got a sayin here in ol Hoot Town if yar were singing ta get a shit house ya wouldnt get a shingle. i think ya might get the roof tho

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