Tuesday, April 26, 2005

HappyJack's on the Wrong Track

Whooee! My ol' Pappy used say that the rats jump from a sinkin' ship. Makes sense t' me. I reckon mebbe ol' Happy Jack Laydown of the NDiPpers is swimmin' against the tide an' tryin' t' climb on board o' the sinkin' Martin steamship. I ain't sayin' the smilin' boy is a rat. He's jest a dumbass.

Polly Wolly Inkwells wrote sum good stuff in his boog today 'bout the $4.6 billion ol' Jackie's tryin' t' loose up from GoodAle's budget. Inky sez that in the big pitcher, them billions don't amount t' nuthin' but a drop in the bucket.

Here's most o' what Polly Wells sez:

Here's the interesting part: everyone's getting all het up over what amounts to chump change.

Like everything else in the second Goodale budget, the corporate tax cuts are rolled in over several years — there are almost none immediately, then more later, so the $4.6 billion is radically back-loaded. But for argument's sake, it averages to $922 million per year over five years.

Now. Compare that to the $12.9 billion, with a 'b', the feds will send to the provinces and territories in equalization and TFF (territorial funding formula) in the single year 2005-06. In other words, this year's share of the total five-year corporate tax cut comes to only 7% of this year's payments for equalization and its territorial equivalent.

Now. Compare that $922 million a year to the real big-ticket budget item, which is total cash and tax-point transfers for health and social programs. That's $47.9 billion for 05-06. The corporate tax cuts come to 1.9% of that figure.

Add equalization, TFF, and cash and tax-point transfers together, and the NDP's bottom line is a penny and a half on every dollar the feds will transfer to the provinces and territories this year. If I were to add in transfers to individuals — pensions, EI payments, and so forth — the corporate tax cuts fall well below a penny on the federal spending dollar.

Draw your own conclusions about what that means. My minimal point is that we have these national debates with incredibly high political stakes and you so rarely see anyone pause to explain the relative scale of things.

("Het up"? Is Inky tryin' t' take up my way o' writin'?)

Okay, Inky Wells, you got me puttin' the $4.6 billion inta perspective. It's raisin' up a big ol' question in my tiny little brain an' I'm tryin' t' "explain the relative scale of things". If $4,600,000,000.00 is chump change, then whaddya call the $250,000,000 that's causin' all the AdScam commotion? An', if I ain't mistook, it's only $100 mil outta that $250 mil that ol' Justus Gump is lookin' at. By Inky's figgerin', AdScam is all 'bout 2.2% of chump change.

Now, one o' the more interestin' things WellsFargo sez is that the bigass taxcuts ain't gonna happen til later on a couplafew years down the road. Laydown is makin' deals with Martin on sumpin' that probbly ain't ever gonna happen. Does Laydown really figger ol' Fartin' Martin's gonna be sittin' in the Pryminister's office a couplafew years down the road?

Alls I see happenin' from these here backroom deals between the Dips an' the Grits is that the votin' Canajuns is gonna see ol' Layton snuggled up under the covers with Martin. Does Laydown figger all them billions is gonna get pumped inta social safety nets before Fartin' Martin goes down the tubes? Even if GoodAle changes his budget t' suit Laydown, we ain't gonna see any effect fer years.

My advice t' Laydown is t' run from the devil Grits. Last year, Canajuns voted fer the "devil we know." Yep, we knew we was votin' fer devils. Now, thanks t' Justus Gumper's Choir Show, we know a lot more 'bout them devils we voted fer. In the movies an' on the TV, yer always seein' these stories where sum pore fool makes a deal with the devil an' later on they gotta pay the piper by fryin' their stoopid ass in Hell fer all eternity.

Sumbuddy oughta sit Layton down an' tell'm all 'bout how he's sellin' his eternal soul. I reckon that'll be a good job fer sum o' Harpoon's thumpin' theo-cons.

Yores trooly,

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