Friday, December 08, 2006

We Got Him!

Whooee! Ol' Spot an' I teamed up an' captured the varmint that's been makin' life miserable fer the last couplafew days. Yesterday, the elusive squirrel escaped. He went inta the basement an' I thought he was inside a cupboard but I reckon he weren't an' he got hisself hid somewheres in the crawlspace.

I heard him gnawin' an' scrabblin' this mornin' an' I set the live trap where I thought he might smell it. Then, ol' Spot an' I went over t' the ballpark an' I tossed the frisbee 50 or 60 times. Spot had a dump. I bagged it. We come home.

When I unleashed SpotFeller, he made a mad dash. I found him in the bathroom with the bushy-tailed rat cornered in the tub. I locked 'em both in while I figgered a plan.

I went in quick-like an' closed the door behind me. I leashed up ol' Spot. All he wants t' do is play with the vermin. I got Spot out with the squirrel still in an' the door closed. The bathroom's purty tiny, too.

I managed t' get the live-trap set in there an' then I went out an' shovelled sum damn snow fer a haff-hour 45 minutes.

I come back in hopin' the rat bastard would be caught in the trap an' ready fer transportation t' Van Diemen's Land. He weren't. He was still in the tub.

I got a blanket from offa the sofa an' I went in an' caught the sumbitch. I had 'im a couplafew times in the blanket an' he squirmed out. Finally, I had 'im all rolled up in a ball inside the blanket. Spot an' I took 'im out back.

I let the sumbitch loose an' I hope t' Jeezuz he don't come back inside. He had hisself a dang good scare, I reckon. 'Specially, when SpottyBoy was givin' 'im whatfor in the slippery ol' bathtub. Yeow!

I jest called Ma at work an' told 'er what great protectors o' the homestead ol' Spot an' me are. I ain't sure she was all that impressed.

Yores trooly,
JimBobby

5 comments:

bigcitylib said...

Congratulations. I'm happy for your sake it wasn't a skunk.

stageleft said...

I think that if I was thinking about grabbing a critter like that in a blanket I'd be looking for the thickest blanket in the city to do the grabbing with JB - ya got bigger ones than me, I'd have gone for explosives once the little begger was trapped. There would be damage, but I rent the place, not own it, so what the heck.

Speaking of skunks, I got a friend out in the country across the river who was bothered by the neighbours cat now and again. One night he heard it outside the door and decided that if he snapped the door open quick enough he could give it a good swift kick in the hindmost parts to send it home.

Everything was going according to plan until his foot was 1/2 way to its destination, which he noticed had a big white uncatlike stripe down it's back.

He tried for a retreat, and almost made it to according to his side of the story, but in cases like that I guess "almost" ain't quite good enough - he lost :-)

Bill Doskoch said...

Here's some of my squirrel stories:

http://billdoskoch.blogware.com/blog/_archives/2005/5/31/898903.html

http://billdoskoch.blogware.com/blog/_archives/2004/10/9/157530.html

Anth said...

For some reason I imagine listening to a redneck Nova Scotian, or maybe even a Newfie. Damn squirrels.

JimBobby said...

Thankee all fer droppin' by an' sharin' my grief an' yer own wildlife stories.

I went an' read yer squirrel encounters o' teh worst kind stories, BillFeller. You gotta good way o' makin' it funny. I reckon it is sorta funny when a wildass rodent invades yer livin' space -- after they're gone, anyways.

Ma an' I bought this little shack 'bout 18 years ago. So far, we had 3 squirrels make it inside the livin' space. We hadda couyplafew other times when tehy was in the attic. Once, we hadda raccoon up in the attic. Ma called Dalton Ginty's twin brother t' chase the sumbitch out.

Everybuddy always aks where they get in but when yer house is 'bout 130 years old an' it weren't nuthin' but a ol' wood frame on stone foundation, there's probbly lots o' places an' if I was t' try pluggin' every hole, I'd go squirrelly an' the rat bastard squirrels'd find sum other way in.

Merry Christmas, fellers an' gals.

JimBobby