Whooee! Jayzuz Flickerin' Christmastree! We ain't had any varmints invadin' the homestead fer a spell but dang it there's sumpin' under the dinin' room.
Ma'd already gone beddy-bye last night when I heard sum scratchin' an' clawin'. Turned out, she heard it, too. Well, I gotta figger out what t' do again. I got me what's called a partial basement in my 125 year-old shack. Most of it's a decent ol' basement but parts is only boarded-up crawlspaces an' anything wants in, they jest gotta get past some thin plywood. One time, we had a damn squirrel walk upstairs an' inta the dinin' room. Sum fun fer the dog. Yeow!
I'm tryin' t' screw up my nerve an' come up with a plan. I got me a live trap big enuff fer a coon. I could set a regular rat trap. I got one o' them, too. I could try the ultra-sonic annoyer-repeller again. I think I still got one that I tried that didn't work worth a shit. I ain't got a gun but I reckon one o' the naybers probbly does. I ain't keen on shootin' off guns inside the house.
Whatever I do means clearin' a path past god-knows-what-all behind the furnace t' get t' the crawlspace openin'.
Wish me luck, friends. I'm up against sum badass rodents or mebbe even a bigass racoon.